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Showing posts from January, 2019

Sick story

A funny story for you.  Well I think it's funny. You might not but fuck it.

So many for you know Thea does not sleep in her bed anymore.  We have a sleepyhead and myhummy all sorts but those things arent the issue.  She has a cough that makes her sick, unless we can sit her up immediately she is sick. Reflux kinda thing.

The other night I was up with her til pretty late 11ish and she had been asleep for a bit. So that's when I put her to bed.  She had her little choking cough but nothing so bad.

Maybe 20 mins later I just get a 1 word text from Iz. HELP. So I thought fuck, what is going on.  I ran upstairs and Thea has been sick ALL over our bed.  I mean, proper all over.  What was worse was there were long pieces of spaghetti all over. Eww fucking disgusting.  As I am the resident sick cleanerupperer as Iz does not deal well with vomit it was my task to scrape the long as pieces of spaghetti off them.

Just imagine it. LONG STRINGS OF SPAGHETTI being peeled off the covers. Yo…

Breastfeeding. The Mummy Blog GUEST POST

Breastfeeding. Easy, right? Just put your boob in their mouth and jobs a goodun?
Not quite.

I knew from quite early on in my first pregnancy that I wanted to breastfeed. It’s what I had my heart set on and nothing was going to stop me. I read all about breastfeeding and how it works, what to expect and so on. I even went as far as not buying any bottles or formula in, I was so set on feeding him myself.

Fast forward a few months and the big day came.
My baby boy was here! He was born early at 37 weeks bang on, by just a few hours. And he was small for gestational age, at just 5lb.
We were incredibly lucky that he didn’t need any help or NICU time and we were allowed home the following day.

Our journey has been a rocky one, to say the very least.  He did not have his first feed until he was a few hours old as I was stuck being stitched up to high heaven. Our first hurdle was flat nipples. (Sorry boys if this is an uncomfortable read - but ya ladies like to overshare).  As he was s…

I've been inspired

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Mother of Daughters, aka big time parent blogger and better half of Father of Daughters did a really good piece on her stories last week on the vagina.  It all stemmed from someone doing the #10yearchallenge showing a vagina, one picture had a "neat" vagina with the labia majora small and tucked in and then the 10 years later presumably after a few kids the labia majora had grown and was now making the vagina look "unclean" or "damaged".  But as we all hopefully know this is not how vaginas work.  Who am I to talk about vaginas I hear you ask?? Well its human anatomy and it's good to be educated right??

My blog post is not going to be exclusively about vaginas.  I want to talk about the Penis. And by that I mean telling you what the ACTUAL parts are. Only gonna be short... not the penis. The blog.

So see the attached image.


There's a few things missing on the diagram that aren't pointed out.  But yes it's not called a Bell End, that's…

How to support your loved one

Today has been an emotional day. So I thought I'd do a quick blog post on how to support your loved ones.  Be it friends or family or all those in between.

1. Be there, like not just in body, but in mind. Try and understand what they are going through, use empathy.
2. Listen. You need to listen to what they're saying and not saying. Do they need space? Do they want a hug? Do they need some "tough love" (this doesn't work on everyone so know your person)
3. Love them. They might be going through some tough shit that you've never experienced and they need that shoulder to cry on.
4. Be quiet.  This is different to listening.  You loved one might just want to know you're in the room with them, quietly listening to music, reading or just scrolling through your phone.
5. Be a confidant. If they are sharing some intimate or upsetting information KEEP IT TO YOURSELF. Friends, and I mean REAL friends, will never gossip about your, tell people your secrets or bet…

Dads night out

Last night I actually went out and had a GREAT time.  I was invited to a 30th at a social club, which are always good, I love social clubs. I saw some old work friends of mine from back in 2012 and talked to some more people that I knew from back in the day as well as my family.

Everyone in Preston pretty much knows everyone else somehow, only 2 degrees of separation rather than 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon (if you know, you know).

I drank beer, was the first at the buffet (standard) and was NOT ready to go home at 12am. NO NO NO NO. Went into town and danced at a place called the 12 Tellers, which closed at 2am, was I ready to go home? NO NO NO. It was a short journey next door to Pop World where I spent the last few hours with my former work colleague and friend.  If you don't know Pop World mainly plays cheesy hits and old SClub 7 songs as well as Steps 5679. You all know the dance.....

At 4am it was time to go! jumped in a taxi pissed up and got home.  I should have got takeaway,…

Feeding kids

You may or may not have seen from my stories today on Instagram that my kids will eat all day every day. Like bottomless pits. if you've missed it, tough luck suckers.

However, the food has to be stuff THEY like. Crisps, chocolate, bananas, bread, biscuits. All the stuff they're not supposed to have loads of but want in gargantuan portions.  They eat breakfast, then want a snack, then want an apple and so on and so on.  But what happens when I make them something that it nutritious and everything that a growing body needs????? they will scoff at me like I have served a steam hot pile of shit in from of them (apart from Thea who will literally eat anything, not shit though, I hasten to add).

If its something that is just off their tastes, they will gag, they will spit it out, they will feign an injury, broken back, herniated disc, ruptured bowel ya know, the usual. Why don't the eat what they're given?? I know why. It because there aren't enough ritual beatings in …

Fun things I do with my kids

I’m gonna try and keep this simple and quite short. Try..

I love playing with my kids and I love taking them out but probably my favourite thing to do with them, especially the boys, as they can walk. Is just walking to the local park and watching them play and playing chasing or helping them up and down the slides and also push them on the swings. What’s better than that? Surely nothing.

Loads of other things we do too, love going to the arcade and playing the 2p machines and computer games, love going swimming and down the big water slides. Love a day out to the zoo or to a farm or to the Lake District but nothing beats... nothing beats our playing in the parks. And guess what. It’s freeee.

I recently bought a book by the Commando Dad and this is full of fun things to do with your kids in the outdoors. Building dens and all that good stuff. You can get it on amazon. I’m sure Neil (commando dad) would appreciate it too.

I’ll start putting in some reviews of places we’ve been and rec…

Gillette, the best a man can get??

So here in my initial thoughts…. I like it. I may be in the minority which I am fine about.But for me the advert represents a change of direction in society. The #metoo movement has brought about some great changes, no more will the elite with the power be able to abuse it. I am the dad that would stop a fight of the kids, I would get involved if I saw a kid being chased and bullied and I would step in if I saw a woman being called and groped.
Has anyone else that twitter thread about being kicked in the balls?? It perfectly describes what our women go through.Our ladies have to put up with A LOT of shit. A LOT, I am actually fearful for the world my daughter might grow up in to.It shouldn’t be this way, women should be able to go on a night out without being groped, without fear, without being harassed, without being fondled, without being spiked, without being raped.Like Terry Crews says, men need to hold other men accountable.
I’ve never been one to wolf whistle or grab women to g…

Travelling with kids.

I wanna talk about a country I really love and want to visit more and more.

I have been to a few Greek islands but one place in particular I want to visit ASAP is Santorini! Have you seen it?? OMG it’s fucking beautiful. The blue domes. Right, you know it??

I’ve been to Rhodes as a kid and I have some really great memories of it. Especially buying Coca Cola from a guy called Nico. Also riding donkeys and our villa that I used to eat my cereal on top of the bed (four poster bed) it had a little roof. Loved it.

I want to travel with the kids but I have the fear of them acting up on the plane or whatever. It’s alright with Alfie as he’s 8 now so gets it but Rowan will be 3 soon and Thea only 1.  I have the fear of them crying all the way and the stares and huffs and puffs from people as I know I would get embarrassed but also aggressive. Might have to leave it a few years before we take them but I am keen to travel.

I bet you thought this was gonna be hints and tips on how to deal with y…

Mental health

I see ALOT of this on social media nowadays. And do you know what I think about it.  FUCKING BRILLIANT.

I have sometimes had issues in speaking about my feelings, fears of getting judged or ridiculed.  It's difficult to put yourself out there.

There's the toxic masculinity populous out there that think that talking about your feelings makes you less of a man, or a pussy, or a fucking whinger or weak.  Fuck them. There is a reason suicide is the biggest killer of men under 45.  We don't TALK, we don't talk to each other. I have 2 friends that I KNOW for 100% that I could tell anything to and they would listen, be receptive, open and honest.  Thats all you need.  You can be all laddy laddy and blokey blokey but dont fear your feelings, have that one person you can speak to.

There's a lady on instagram called the_island_mama_life and she did a mini series on her gram called "finding your people".  I urge you to do the same, if you're getting peer pressur…

DadsComm

I love Dadscomm.

I love the chat we have, it's gone quiet recently but still a great bunch of guys.  I love the support it brings.

I want it to grow, I want to help charities, I want to help people in need.  It's all about putting it in place.  That's where its difficult sometimes. Having the time to email these people and places to try and organise things.  I have my own account on Instagram (daddyfootandco) which I am trying to grow more profitable as well as grow Dadscomm too.

It's tough but I reckon I can do it.  With a bit of support, maybe a bit of luck too??

What would you want to see from a support page like that? More support to charities? If you're a dad do you need support and want to come in to the chat? Or do you know someone who is not okay who could do with the support??

I know its not a unique idea I have had but I think it's one of the best dad pages out there.  It used to be three of us running it now its down to little old me.

Let me know.

All jumbled up

Do you have just get all muddled up that you forget what you're doing??

I have loads of ideas for blog posts but then when I sit down on my laptop to do them they all just disappear into the ether of neverwhere.

I am writing this one so it'll jog my memory and also so I can look back and go "oh shit, yeah I want to do one on THAT topic, that topic etc etc".

Ok so more parenting ones. I've fairly experienced in the parenting space, maybe more funny stories as well as the horror stories too.

Talk about my early life, what I remember from the 1980's (some of you weren't even born then)

Talk about the 90's or what I remember of them.  I think, think some people who follow me might only have been born in 2000 or maybe even a couple after then.  Which is weird to me as I still think the year 2000 was like 5 years ago. Time flies.

Funny birthday stories.

Holidays I've been on.

What I want to do in the future.

More on mental health.

Instagram support.

You…

Things to do before 35

So today 10/01/2019 is my 35th birthday. So what I'm going to do for todays blog is to do a "list". One of the things you see on Buzzfeed etc and see how many I have done. So here goes.....this might be a female orientated one but lets do it anyway.

1. Live alone.
Growing up with parents or mentors is great. Living with roommates and going out all night is also great. But nothing compares to spreading out and enjoying your own space in your own way, with just yourself to rely on.

Yes I have done this, I moved out when I was 18 and lived by myself pretty much until I met Alfie's mum when I was 26.

2. Break someone's heart...
It's not going to be something you enjoy doing, but sometimes we end up hurting others because we don't want the same things from life as they do. It sucks, but it's life.
Yeah done this a few times. sorry about that/


3. And, of course, get your heart broken.
You'll never forget the nights when you cry yourself to sleep, but th…

Random advice

Hey guys,

Firstly thanks for those who consistently read the blog and give me feedback. you know who you are.

I've got some random pieces of crappy (maybe not) advice to give. Hopefully it'll help you in 2019.

1. Don't order takeaway chips delivered. They NEVER taste good as the condensation on the journey make them into limp little dicks and NO ONE likes a limp dick, am I right ladies?? ;-)

2. Buy more long socks.  I've worn long socks for the past two days and its really its been a revelation. So warm, so comfy.  Obviously for the winter months.

3. Papa Johns pizza is better than Dominoes. Dont @ me on this one. its better, order that instead if you can.

4. Don't be a dick. Like, this should be a simple one.  Don't troll people, if someone upsets you on the internet just fucking move on. Instagram doesn't matter, Facebook doesn't matter. It all doesn't matter. Real life matters.

5. Help your friends businesses. These are you friends we're talk…

The Fear, The Anxiety

I was very tired yesterday so couldn't be arsed writing a blog in all honesty. Did you check out the Guest Post btw? I think Ben did a great job.
Today I want to talk about The Fear. The fear that comes along with Anxiety.  Let me ask you, do you ever have those days were you're feeling fine. everything is tickety boo and then all of a sudden, you get dread. Like, out of no where you start thinking something horrible is going to happen.  You can't put your finger on it but your heart beats faster, you worry over everything and you get hot and go into a fight or flight mode.
That's anxiety for me, I feel my hearty pounding and just wanna run. Why does your body do this??? it makes no sense, survival instinct maybe? but where there is no need to survive. You're just sat on your fucking couch man.
How do you combat it? I try and calm down. Try, sometimes fail.  I breath through it. count to 10 slowly, breath, hold it, blow it all out.
Its a tough old world but you can…

Guest post! 10 commandments for parenting creativity

Today's post is hopefully the first of many guest posts on the blog.  I love sharing the love and getting other people's ideas into the mix. Please read Ben's 10 commandments for parenting creativity.


1) Use exciting materials If your children are fed up potato printing vaguely recognisable triangles, try buying them some water-based spray paints- they’ll love it. Banksy managed to spray paint his name on the side of an elephant. Probably not a safe or ethical idea, instead maybe challenge your kid to spray paint their name on the neighbour's cat!? Or a local politician you don’t really like. Or just a canvas if you want to be boring.

 2) Let them see you do it If children grow up seeing you at least trying to be creative then they are more likely to have a pop. Don't think you're creative? Trying getting into your underwear, bathing in paint and then dancing energetically to the Prodigy. Anyone can do that, and you can convince them it's art. Obviously don…

Greenlands Farm review

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This is going to be a bit of a different blog than usual as I slept well again and fancy doing something different. I’m going to do a review.

I’m going to review somewhere where we go quite often. Probably been about 20 times. It’s called Greenland’s Farm Village in Milnthorpe which is north from us on the M6 junction 35. I’m not being paid FYI.

So yeah, firstly the car park is actually huge: which I like, there is nothing worse than places with small car parks.

I took all three kids today which is the first time I have taken them all by myself. It was half price entry today too so that was good. When you go in the animals are pretty much just out, like they let the pigs walk around, the Pygmy goats are just walking round and are very cute and the Emu is just around.

There is donkey rides too, which we don’t do but they’re there. They will have lambs soon too and that’s always fun to go and see them as you get to feed them and who doesn’t like baby lambs.

They have a cool little sand …

Guest blog posts

You'll be happy to learn that I am better rested today and feeling a bit better, had lots of nice fresh air and a couple of beers and a nice pub lunch. Can't go wrong with a pub lunch and a beer.

Anyway onto the subject I want to cover today.  That of Guest Blogs. I have been approached a few times by different people offering to guest blog on this blog.  I'm not really sure what this blog is yet and have literally been spewing out my verbal garbage <----read in french accent, and my feelings and such like.  If you've read it you understand I generally just ramble on, it helps getting the thoughts out on my head and onto the "paper" so to speak.  So yeah I've been asked if people can guest on my blog.  Why the fuck not?? sounds like a grand idea to me.

I will take all comers, as long as you're writing about something interesting and its not something I consider boring liiiike garden hose maintenance or great wrenches that changed the world, then I&…

Am I selfish??

3rd of January.

We’re three days into the new year and I’m still sleep deprived. I’ve got my daughter Thea sleeping on me as we speak and in totally fucked. It’s 5.45am and I’ve been up since 4am.

I need to sleep, I’m dying here. It’s rough in the house too. Whirlwind of emotions. I’m sleeping when my wife is awake and vice versa and before the new year we had bad news from my wife’s side of the family.

I don’t know how long I can deal with the sleep deprivation. I’m also starving, I want me own space, I want to go out. I’ve not had a night out in over a year and I love to dance so I’m properly suffering. I want to go somewhere by myself for the day.

I’m going to do that actually, I need to have more time for myself.  One day a month isn’t a lot is it? To keep me sane?? To keep my sanity??? Am I being selfish by doing that? Its 12 days throughout the whole year, surely thats not that bad?

I feel like I’ve lost my identity a bit. Ever feel like that?

If you need me let me know.

New year new me bullshit

I am not a fan of the New Year, New Me shit. I believe if you want to make a change you can do it at any time. But I am not against making goals. Also only 8% of people keep to their resolutions but I hope you’re one of them if you do that type of thing.

One of my goals if to continue to write my blog. I’ve done one almost every day since I started and as Joanna Johnson of allthefamily fame it is very cathartic. Jo had also put a very good list together of the 10 things you can do to help your mental health, see the link https://allthefamilyworld.wordpress.com/2019/01/01/ten-new-years-resolutions-that-will-help-your-mental-health/

I find writing helps me put things in to perspective and also get my thoughts out there. Never realised I had so much to say until I started writing it down.

I will be 35 in 9 days and want to make this a really good year. 2018 was not the best of years but hoping something will come of 2019. I’m planning big things with Dadscomm, supporting charities, suppo…