Sick and shit

Today I want to talk about sick and shit. Lol. I’m really hoping these key words don’t pick up the scat weirdos. Guys if you came her for scat porn I’m sorry to disappoint you that’s not what this one is about. Haha.

Back to it, so, the nappies, the vomit. How do I even begin. If you’re a parent like me you would have undoubtedly experienced the nightmare nappies. The ones where the shit reaches to the back of the child’s head (how is that even fucking possible?!?!?). It’s seems to defy all logic and gravity. The ones where you know the clothes are unable to be saved and you have to throw the whole nuclear waste away.   In their hair!!?! How the fuck!!!! This is happens loads of times with all of my kids, the memories are too far away to remember specifics with Alfie but they are fresh as a bloody daisy with my dear Thea  and also Rowan too.

My children constantly surprise me with the amount of body fluids they hold. As we speak my daughter is asleep on me as Izzy has been up with her all night as she’s been throwing up.

The projectile vomit has never really bothered me and vomit in general does not really bother me. I just get in with it, saying that I hate being sick myself. It’s literally one of the worst things that can happen to me. I still feel like I wanna call for my mum when I’m throwing up as she used to look after me so well as a kid. 

Being the bearded gent that I am it has happened on occasion where I get the luscious vomit perfume in there. Now that feels like it takes a while to get the musk out. Lucky my beard is washable, lol. But yeah what the fuck is it with babies and toddlers that they can be totally fine one minute and then a bucket load of vomit fly out of their mouths the next, but then, off they go skipping away like nowt has happened. Little shits.

I’d love to hear your experiences on the topic. Bet they’re bloody hilarious.

As always let me know if you need me my gorgeous readers.


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